Perspective

The last six months of my life...Oh boy. Lots of deep shit. Without rehashing the events that have taken place or how I have handled them I can honestly say I have held it together. The issues that I had may not be as serious as some others but everything is relative. Someone could be having a fat day and I feel their pain. I will not roll my eyes or belittle what anyone is going through anymore. Somone may have had an accident or be accused of saying or doing something; I will not immediately judge that he or she was in the wrong or that any of the words are true. If someone has done wrong, as I do at times, and asks for forgiveness, I will give it and move on. For real. Case closed.

I have grown very close to a handful of people and we all lead very different lives..yet connect in such a way that we respect and want to spend time with each other. How awesome is that! To have people in your life that actually like you, do things for you and are there for you without expecting anything in return.

I look at the whole picture of my life. So life may seem shitty right now but actually I am in the best place I can be. What? I do not have a job! I do not know if I would be able to train for my very first Ironman while working. I am all about 100% in most everything I do however; the way my body and mind is right now I feel exhaustion. I look at this group of people that I am around most of my time and am completely impressed. They have time for work, training and me. We laugh so much and if it wasn't for them I may see things less positive right now.

Sometimes I feel like the family I have made through Ironman training feels closer and connects more than my real family. I am known to make friends easily This group was itimidating to me at first. I write this to say just jump in. Take the past headtrash and chatter out of your self confidence and low self esteem and start over. People want a connection and want to feel cared for. They could be just as intimidated of you as you of them.

I can only be me and I want to be your friend. I am interested in who you are and what you are about. Until I have a reason not to trust you I will hold true to that.