Starting Over. ( dramatic, I know)

Whenever evil befalls us, we ought to ask ourselves, after the first suffering, how we can turn it into good. So shall we take occasion, from one bitter root, to raise perhaps many flowers.
Leigh Hunt (1784 - 1859)

I like this quote because now that I am starting to climb out of this hole I fell into I can look back and see there were still some great things that happened. I could not wait for the day I could do that. Look back and reflect on a really hard time. I am still not quite out yet but I see the light.

Firstly, I was able to rescue and spend time with the two most wonderful animals. Peenut entered my life when Jager and my friend Leslie died and I lost my job at the beginning of our economic crisis. Peenelope entered when my friend Kim rescued her and her siblings as soon as they were born. Born in a crate with horrible and hot conditions from people that should go to jail. I offered to help find them a good home and ended up adopting Penelope turned Peenelope ( to go with Peenut). My unemployment has allowed me the time with them to get them acquainted with each other with me around and spend time socializing and training Peenelope. Lee Mannix helped me out with cost for the class and it was such a blessing. These are my babies that I hope to have for a very long time.

I also got to see what real friends are all about. I realize it is tough to stay around someone who is going through a rough patch. One must have the compassion, patience and understanding that this could happen to them at the drop of a hat. Just being there to listen, run, ride or just sit at a yogurt shop and Whole Foods and eat is exactly what I needed. My girlfriends ( tri and non tri) kept me from getting lost in my "cave". Granted I know a few people just don't want to be around me anymore and I completely get that. I don't want to be around them either...so this experience really weeded out some bad seeds for me. Summer is here and I am ready to come out of my cave, start my new job and I look foward to the opportunities that await me. These friends get to be around a new and improved positive Alisa that will be there for them always.

My family would not allow me to lose my house. I waited till I absolutely had to till I needed their help. It was the worst feeling for me that I had to borrow money so I could pay my mortgage. Going over my budget and letting family in like that is horrible. I have always had a lucrative career and been able to be independent of them. Now I was broke and unable to train or go out or do anything that was fun. I would have to explain that so I felt controlled. That was just something I had to deal with until I found an appropiate job opportunity. They understood when I did not want to be around for big family gatherings and it took a lot of "getting it" to agree to that. I realize the importance of family once again and how important they are in my life. Even though we disagree on about 85% of the things I like to do and how I live my life, ex. marathon and not wanting to give birth, we still agree on how important we are to each other.

I look at people who work hard for their money and hope they never take it for granted. I learned the reason for saving hard earned money and that got me through about 8 months of not working...and that includes the small fortune I spent on Ironman. You NEED that money because ya never know when something like what happened to me will happen again.

Thank heavens, for family, friends and animals....and running and biking. :)

outside sales versus office job

I have been going over in my mind and trying to convince myself the decision I am about to make will be a good change.

I am so uneasy about going into an office everyday. I am used to walking into many different offices, meeting new people, and just being outside. I am used to having my office at my house and the flexibility of that was awesome.

This new opportunity will be different. I will be in an office and mostly on the phone with the occasional visit.

The pros to this are:

If we both decide to move forward the office is near Lost Creek so I can run the greenbelt at lunch.

I won't have to drive around my manager who is in town to work with me. I have to warn every account that I will have my manager with me so they don't feel double teamed. That was a big pain in the arse. I won't miss that.

I won't have to drive to Waco or Victoria to visit an account. The office is 10 minutes from my house. Easy breezy.

I won't have to drive around when the weather is crappy and the crazy drivers and traffic are plentiful. I can stay comfy and safe in the building.

Maybe this will provide a new structure for me. I will be able to get some hard workouts in early in the morning and then at night and won't have to walk in and out of offices with heals on. That will be happy times for my calves and achilles.

I won't have to leave town for a week to wherever my home office is ( Boston, CA, Washington....) for a national sales meeting. Those are exhausting!

So maybe this will be a good thing. It is still a mostly commission position so not being face to face to make a deal will be challenging...but this is a different sell that I can make work over the phone.

Second interview today and we both still need to make our decision.

Will update the blog once I know.

Till then...