Crazy for wanting to try an Ironman?

Rolling through 2008 events I think about all that has happened good and bad. The bad seems to stick in my head more than the good. I gotta remind myself to think of the good things I have going for me so those awful things don't depress me.

Just in the last two months, a training friend died, my kitty died, I lost my job, hard times with some of my family and my good friend Leslie is in the hospital sedated for now 13 days with a a vent and dialysis trying to stay alive. A friend decided to bitch my out on New Year's Eve over text messaging for "dissing her", got a speeding ticket and gained 8 pounds. It hurts when I get flat out lied. Three people in my life in 2008 lied to my face. Kills me.

Training for an Ironman this year will keep me from going into a state of depression I believe. I will be able to think clearly, stay healthy, meet people that are a positive influence in my life and have a focus on something other than the negative. This level of training will raise my endorphins to a point that I can turn these negatives into a positive. I will have less anxiety about life so I can move forward not worrrying so much. I won't be able to let myself sleep all day and cut myself off from my friends and family.

I am getting to a point in my life where I more ready than ever to get serious about what I want to be when I grow up. At 37 ( 38 this year)I am going to change my career, do an Ironman and learn to not be so commitment retarded as far as men go; meaning learn to not be attracted to the emotionally unavailable. That seems to be safe for me because I know it won't work out. I am ready to make it work. I will send out a better vibe.

I would be lying if I said losing weight wasn't a HUGE part of this training. I can't wait to walk into a store and everything fits!

I am ready to move forward and learn from the experiences good and bad instead of feeling sorry for myself. Keep my head up and stay positive and remember the many great friends I do have, the family I am lucky to have, my health, Peenut, the home I own, the car I have, and all that I have become in the years up to now.

I am excited to train for this Ironman. Doing an Ironman on my 38th birthday will be amazing.