Tuesday, February 26, 2013

Ok I am listening!

Ok, what!?

For years I have been in outside medical sales. In 1998 I met this lady, running of all things ( I didn't run at the time but thought I would give it a go) and we started chatting. Well, I started running with her and we started chatting. Her name was Shirley Leonard. I didn't even have to look that up.

She convinced me to leave corporate wellness (where I excelled but made shit money) and offered me an almost triple raise in salary to go into pharma sales. From there I went on into diagnostic sales, surgical sales, dental implant sales, and lab sales. See a pattern? I do.

I am good at sales but it isn't me. I want to help people...not bullshit them into thinking I want to help them. I really want to help them. But you don't make money doing that. I made myself truly believe in everything I sold so I wouldn't feel like I was a salesperson. I consulted surgeons, hospitals and offices into buying what I sold. Somewhere down the line I lost my edge. The flirting and ass kissing makes me sick. But again, I made a good living.

I have gone from making 90K to a salary on unemployment.

Before your head's start turning with ....oh my gosh! You should totally work with dogs!...I don't want to do that. I LOVE, LOVE, LOVE animals but that is my "hobby" and those are my children. Not what I want to do for a living.

I was recently approached by the new director at South Austin Cardiac Rehab where I was doing my volunteer ( clinical ) hours previously to be an Exercise Physiologist. I was not getting the hands on opportunities I thought I would so I stopped going and continued in sales. The new director assured me I would get to be more hands on with some training if I would like to come back and continue getting my hours.

So now I need to go full steam ahead, change careers and make the next 40-60 years of my life fullfilled both professionally and personally. I have a lot to work on in both areas and I am finally getting to a point that I know I need to get it together. I am not sure yet what it is that I want but I feel like I am getting closer. The fact that I am open to change is a step. FOMO ( in this case - foward motion). Most of all I think I am becoming more aware of what I DON'T want.

How am I not depressed? I think what made me a good "sales person" is my ability to not look like there is anything wrong. I am a little sad but not depressed. I refuse to let that happen. Get up, take care of my responsibility to my dogs, my health and my head and it will all work out right?

I am not sad or depressed....just scared. There. I admit it. Here we go. Yikes.

1 comment:

  1. good, good. you know you have friends right there with you, love.

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